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lιly evanѕ - ic contact;; ☏ ✉
[ ohnoohnoohnoohno ]
Probably. Possibly. Not to sound dodgy, but people know different things. I'm going to say 'yes' and also 'I'm sorry', for starters.
What happened?
Probably. Possibly. Not to sound dodgy, but people know different things. I'm going to say 'yes' and also 'I'm sorry', for starters.
What happened?
I wanted to tell you.
Well, no. I didn't. It's horrid! And scary. Being hunted down personally by the Dark Lord isn't exactly the first thing you want to tell someone about as soon as they arrive in space with you.
Edited 2013-04-14 11:50 pm (UTC)
Edited 2013-04-14 11:50 pm (UTC)
It wasn't that I didn't think you could handle it, or that you didn't deserve to know, it just felt too soon to try and explain. I only just found out a few weeks ago and I'm still reeling from it. How was I supposed to bring myself to try and be the one to explain it to you?
I'm not trying to make excuses, it sounds like I am but- You should have seen the look on Remus' face, James, it didn't even seem real. To think that all of us got that close only for it to
I should have told you about Harry, straight off. That was the part I really did want to tell you. Not even out of some obligation, but- Have you spoken to him? Met him face-to-face yet? He looks just like you, it's almost unnerving. Once you get past the ( surreal ) fact that he's older than the both of us, he's like- It's like I can see all of your best qualities in him. Which sounds crazy, I know it sounds completely mental, but it's all I kept thinking about after I finally spoke with him. The only reason why I didn't tell you was because
... well, it's a bit embarrassing, isn't it? It's embarrassing and intimidating and bonkers and how do you walk up to someone and say "Yes, hi, I'd like you to meet Harry Potter. That's right, your son, and mine as well - see there, his eyes? - so I suppose that means we really do fall in love and get married and have this kind of perfect son." when I also know that we're not even around to
we don't get to be there for him. Through any of it. There's this whole Prophecy, it's like something straight out of our History book, honestly. And honestly, that's the part about my future that scares me the most. I knew it would be difficult, I never thought I would live to be one-hundred and twenty years old and find the perfect career in the Ministry and finally try to sort out all of the bias against Muggleborns, I never thought it would turn out that way for me. I knew I would be fighting for a long time. That we all would be. But to find out I fall in love, and have this wonderful son, and find new friendships in people as loyal and passionate as Remus and Sirius ( do not tell them I said that, yeah? ) and then just to lose it all in.. three years' time, that's what I can't really stand to think about. It's too much.
I guess I just panicked at the idea of you finding all of that out as well.
I guess I just panicked at the idea of you finding all of that out as well.
[ it's too bad that this is over text because she is missing out on the way she's actually making him smile. ]
have I ever told you you talk too much?
especially when you're nervous.
have I ever told you you talk too much?
especially when you're nervous.
seriously though, it's all mental isn't it?
there's this prophecy and this whole future ahead of us that's actually just there. laid out, already done for some kid.
and now he has to come back and tell it to a bunch of us before it even happens.
he's older and he's gone through the entire bloody war and I swear it's just
there's this prophecy and this whole future ahead of us that's actually just there. laid out, already done for some kid.
and now he has to come back and tell it to a bunch of us before it even happens.
he's older and he's gone through the entire bloody war and I swear it's just
mental.
and we're not even there for it.
and we're not even there for it.
are you busy?
Not at the moment, no.
You're not mad, are you? I can't tell if you calling me adorable was sarcastic or not.
You're not mad, are you? I can't tell if you calling me adorable was sarcastic or not.
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heorot on April 15th, 2013 03:21 am (UTC)text; he just figures that they should probs talk in person about this :c
I'm not mad at you, specifically.
just
I guess I'm still trying to wrap my head around everything
hasn't really sunken in yet
just
I guess I'm still trying to wrap my head around everything
hasn't really sunken in yet
heorot on April 15th, 2013 03:21 am (UTC)text; and he wants to see her, what with them having a son and all on board
have you been to the gardens?
prefectly on April 15th, 2013 03:42 am (UTC)text; LOL that's exactly why she's NERVOUS butinagoodway
I actually haven't yet.
[ but she can guess where this is going... and she owes him an explanation in person, at the very least, even if she has every intention of jinxing him if he makes some joke about the mechanics behind the, ah, creation of Harry Potter. THANKYOUVERYMUCH. ]
Want to come have a look with me?
[ but she can guess where this is going... and she owes him an explanation in person, at the very least, even if she has every intention of jinxing him if he makes some joke about the mechanics behind the, ah, creation of Harry Potter. THANKYOUVERYMUCH. ]
Want to come have a look with me?
why miss evans I thought you'd never ask ;)
[ because it's easier to hide behind jokes and the same sort of humor than it is to really let himself think about what he's doing. Much easier than letting himself freak out about any of this. ]
I'll meet you there in...fifteen minutes?
Edited (yeah james is more impatient than that) 2013-04-15 03:46 am (UTC)
[ because it's easier to hide behind jokes and the same sort of humor than it is to really let himself think about what he's doing. Much easier than letting himself freak out about any of this. ]
I'll meet you there in...fifteen minutes?
Edited (yeah james is more impatient than that) 2013-04-15 03:46 am (UTC)
See you soon.
[ she doesn't even know if it's physically possible to get from her room to the Gardens in fifteen minutes, it's some distance away, but. oh well. she doesn't rush, but she does head right out once she sends that last text. ]
[ she doesn't even know if it's physically possible to get from her room to the Gardens in fifteen minutes, it's some distance away, but. oh well. she doesn't rush, but she does head right out once she sends that last text. ]
[ see, James' little secret here is that he's been sitting in the Gardens the entire time. he needs space, to think, and it was the only place that didn't make him feel claustrophobic. something he's starting to feel like might become a problem, living inside a space ship.
so he said fifteen minutes only because he didn't want to make it seem like he's been sitting out here. alone. even though he was. so when it feels like it's been close enough to fifteen minutes, he heads to the entrance of the gardens, spinning his wand around his fingers as he looks around for lily.
because honestly? he has no idea why he asked her to come. sure, he's a social creature, doesn't want to be alone, but after all he's learned and all he knows - now - it should feel awkward. and it might, still. he doesn't even know. some part of him thought it was a good idea, maybe, to at least talk to her about it. see what she thought. maybe he wasn't as alone in this awkward state of fear and confusion as he thought. ]
so he said fifteen minutes only because he didn't want to make it seem like he's been sitting out here. alone. even though he was. so when it feels like it's been close enough to fifteen minutes, he heads to the entrance of the gardens, spinning his wand around his fingers as he looks around for lily.
because honestly? he has no idea why he asked her to come. sure, he's a social creature, doesn't want to be alone, but after all he's learned and all he knows - now - it should feel awkward. and it might, still. he doesn't even know. some part of him thought it was a good idea, maybe, to at least talk to her about it. see what she thought. maybe he wasn't as alone in this awkward state of fear and confusion as he thought. ]